Mindset

Mindset, Speaking

The Confidence Question—and an Answer

The Confidence Question—and an Answer: It was a familiar request. So many clients come to me with the same goal. “I want,” she said, “to sound and feel more confident when speaking in person and on Zoom, especially when introducing myself and explaining what I do.” You know I don’t offer myself as a mindset coach, although people often do change their mindset during our work together. In a way, I’m more of a bodyset coach. Seems to me that one good path to a new way of thinking and feeling is through the body. And it starts, of all places, with the feet.

Read more >>

Confident woman speaker 36177595 m normal none
Mindset, Speaking

This, too …

This, too shall pass. It was such a good reminder in an email from a friend. “It came to pass,” she wrote. “It did not come to stay.” Exactly right! Whatever “it” is in our lives right now, one thing we can be sure of is that it came to pass. And our experience tells us it definitely didn’t come to stay. It’s so easy to get into a spiral of doom when things go badly in our personal or professional lives. I don’t know about you, but I find myself imagining that life will remain exactly as it is today—forever. Maybe you lost a job you loved and thought, “I’ll never find another position as perfect for me.” “I’m going to miss those wonderful colleagues I won’t see anymore.” Or even, “I’ll never work again.” (Yes, I have more than a passing familiarity with unemployment.)

Read more >>

photo of sad dog looking out window in the rain.
Communication, Mindset

How’s Your Social Fitness?

How's your social fitness: Mine is right there in black and white: “There’s room for you to develop some good social fitness habits that will keep your relationships strong.” Let’s just say I didn’t get an A+ on the Friendship Quiz from the New York Times. Their Well newsletter writers concede that I do have “the outline of a healthy social network.” But, they tell me, “You could go a step further.” Are you wondering why I’d take a Friendship Quiz? Or why a paper like the NYT would run one? They’re not Cosmo, after all. The quiz is step one in Well’s week-long “Happiness Challenge” based on the idea that happiness helps us stay healthy, and robust relationships are among the things that make us happy. In fact, they may be the main thing that makes us happy.

Read more >>

photo of two young girls talking on a tin can telephone
Business Communication, Mindset

Who’s Influencing Whom? And How?

I’m recovering from surgery. If all went according to plan, I have a couple of newly realigned vertebrae, with pins to keep them where they belong as they heal. Fortunately, I also have meds to keep me from crawling the walls while that healing happens. Spinal surgery is a little scary. It’s been four years since my last experience with post-surgical rehab and my observations about how easily we can catch each other’s moods, for better or worse. And emotional states are contagious You know how you’ll see someone yawn and right away yawn yourself? The same thing goes on with facial expressions, even quick, subtle ones. Postures, gestures, and tones of voice can have similar impact.

Read more >>

mojher and her daughter playing with love near a window while raining day.
Communication, Mindset

Don’t Talk to Strangers? Maybe We Should.

People assigned to talk with a stranger enjoy themselves more than those who keep themselves to themselves. Yes, even self-described introverts tended to have a better time than they would have predicted when they break the ice and start a conversation. When it comes to these ordinary interactions in our daily lives, in general, folks underestimate how much they’ll enjoy longer talks. They underestimate how much they’ll enjoy deeper exchanges. And they underestimate how much they’ll like the person they’re talking to. And get this. People even underestimated how positive a compliment would make the other person feel.

Read more >>

Anniversary photo by Peggy